"Hey, do you surf, man? Are you a surfer?"

Plastic is not healthy for children and other living things. Photo: Chris Jordan

"Oh, no... Not me, I'm just a garbage man."  Certainly one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies of all time, Big Wednesday. So I think about Bear every time I pick up a new piece of trash and it makes me smile. Bear and I have a lot in common actually. We both drink too much, lost our shops, ex wives, etc, etc, etc... Only real difference, I am a surfer, man.. And it's getting harder, and harder to keep my head in the sand regarding all this plastic and crap washing up on the beach.  So I adopted a one mile stretch of beach that runs about the middle of LC about a mile north to the now nearly infamous surf spot I call "the curve". It's called something else now. But then I still call Pipes, Stables,  Leo Carrillo, Secos,  Zeros, Nicholas Canyon, No way man.. that's Point Zero!!! Maybe it's just Zero. Fact checking is not a huge part of my writing arsenal, I often find a vague recollection will do.. None of those spots are on my route anyway. What's your point Don, you want a sign or something?

A garbage collectors best friends

Not really, I just thought it might inspire some other obsessive compulsive eco-kook like myself to go on a mission to clean up his beach, lake, park, or yard. I'm no saint, in fact for at least 25 years I was flicking lit cigarettes out the window of my Landcruiser. Hundreds of them, probably more. My van isn't exactly green, but I did recently buy a new electric bike that gets 1200 miles to the gallon, and I've been trying hard to keep that van in the driveway. So I have come up with a comprehensive list of criteria that needs to be met before I hop in van and blast five miles into town. Topping that list is the "you better have more than one thing to do in town or you're not going clause"  ie.. No running into to town just buy a carton of eggs when your neighbor would probably be happy to give you a couple. Now a twelve pack of Sierra Nevada on the other hand, is a lot to ask, not to mention carry on your back.  Note to self... Buy a case next time. I don't want too be to preachy here. Just sayin'.. I'm changing my world, and you can't stop me. Personally I'm about as optimistic as Yvon Chouinard on the matter of saving the earth, but I'm out there walking my dogs anyway so why not. It was that very point that I took to heart when KS11 put it out there on twitter.

Happy Birthday!

Anyway.. I think the cigarette butt usually tops the list during California's Annual Coastal Clean Up. But it's the plastic bottle cap, usually from a single use plastic beverage container that tops the list on my stretch of beach. Followed closely by tiny bits of broken up plastic. Yes, styrofoam sucks, as does discarded fishing line. Ok. Environmentally speaking, all foam sucks, including the pieces of rotted out surfboards lost years ago that occasionally break free from that seawall just north of here. Balloons are disgusting after they've been floating down the trash superhighway. Can you think of another way to say Happy Birthday, or I love you? No not doves! If you are not aware of this my friends, there is a place in the middle of the the ocean the size of Texas no, the size of France, where chemical sludge, fishing nets, tires, just about anything and everything that floats, even those seemingly harmless Rubber Ducks you have floating in your bath tub. To be sure there are more than a few broken surfboards in the mix, along with some of my other favorite petroleum based products like, wetsuits, sunglasses, wax, and my Mick Fanning signature Reef sandals with bottle opener on the bottom, and the plastic bags. Actually I think wax sinks. Yes, I have a vague recollection of watching my wax slowly disappear into the deep, and slipping all over my board the rest of the day, but the plastic bags, please...

Today's Haul

Fucking A.. Using two fucking plastic bags to carry a big bottle of laundry detergent that already has a built in handle is pure insanity, isn't it? Yhink about it. It's actually harder to carry that way. Ever have your wine drop out the bottom of one of those things. The bags are virtually useless, especially when you consider that almost everything thing we buy usually comes pre-packaged in plastic, or with a built in handle. I am proud to be part of a town that just adopted Ordinance No. 655. That being, Carpinteria's Plastic Ban Ordinance, passed only two weeks ago.  Now ask yourself, did we really have to make it a law to do the right thing?  I guess we did. The fines are $100, $200, $500, for consectutive offenses of passing a single plastic bag. But your town doesn't have to wait, Carpinteria Albertson's has been voluntarily bag-less for almost a year now and it works. Do you really want to wait for your city council to tell you what to do? SB? Ventura? California? World? 

I think we have a problem here.

There are scientists out there being paid good money to pick up trash, sort it out, and catalog it on beautiful remote south pacific islands. So maybe I'm an idiot to be doing it for free in LC, but I'm not the only one. The awesome ladies of La Conchita, which include the first woman to ever grace the cover of surfer magazine sweep through town every Monday, and have treats for your dog too!  Still, I realize that not all of you have dogs that wake you up at 6:45am sharp with their leash in their mouth ready to hit the beach. So being a garbage man is probably not an option for everyone. However, I just read about another idea called the "Save 10 Movement" Just try to save 10 pieces of trash from going in the water anytime your at the beach. I know what your thinking. You're going to put me out of a job. Don't even worry about it. I'm having no trouble filling a medium sized trash bag once a week, and sadly, I can't keep up with it. After the gale force winds we had over the weekend, a crap load of foam from a obviously destroyed boat came floating in. You know the kind of foam they inject into the bulkhead, and everywhere else to keep it afloat. Well it didn't work. I did a search to see if any small craft went missing that weekend, but really there's no telling where this came from. It could have come from anywhere, but it is very interesting how the trash flotilla basically stays together. The porta-potty,oil cans, krazy glue, pens, pencils, oven cleaner, gas cans, anything that didn't sink to the bottom washed up right here.  Pick 5, Pick 2, Pick 1, or just pick up after yourself.  At this point I'm probably preaching to the choir now anyway, but if even one person reads this and makes a change.. Then well, that's pretty cool, so thanks! 

Free Beer!

Yep... There is an unlimited amount of crap washing up on are shorelines every day, but believe it or not there are still people leaving their own trash behind on a daily basis. Fishermen top my list at the moment, followed closely by partiers who are simply unwilling, or afraid to pack up their empty beer cans. Sure they occasionally leave a full one for me, but where the hell have these people been living the past ten years. This is the new millennium, the environmental revolution, reduce, reuse, recycle,  elf, Jack Johnson. Remember the Indian with a tears running down his face. That was back in the seventies! You're telling me in the year two thousand and twelve, people actually think it's perfectly fine to leave their trash behind wherever they want? Whatever... Ok I'll pick it up for you, no worries. Sadly I'm sure the partiers and beach goers will eclipse anything the fishermen are doing as soon as we hit summer, but thats another story. "That's the lemon next to the pie"

LC on Ten Dollars a Week - Two hundred forty-three dollars, and eighty-one cents later...

Good news for the one percent

It's Thursday, December 15, 2011, and I still have about five days to go. I have spent $243.81 since my last confession. Add that to the $77.73 from the first four days, and you'll see I ran out of money and fell into the red about $71.54 ago. Prescriptions, expensive dog food, emergency shower repairs for your daughter, it all adds up. Not to mention the beer and wine. The good news is I managed a 7 day surfing streak for free. Fifteen hours worth. Sure it included paddling the sup from LC to the north and back one day, and yesterday was nothing to write home about but.. I don't know? Can you write about glassy perfectly shaped waist high lefts with no one out? I just did. Well.. It is certainly no reason to stay out of the water especially after being dry three days straight earlier in the week.

Obviously not the same day

The rest of the days were average. (average waves, not spending) But an average wave at that spot just north of here is still pretty dang good. And average waves this winter, are starting to look better than ever. One day I paddled out into head high sets with just a friend and a sup guy out. Normally that sup kook would have pissed me off but something special was happening here. It didn't last long, but the best part of that session was paddling back out after we'd caught the first few waves of the set, and watching 3 or 4 more roll though unridden. Sweet. Won't forget about that for a while. I remember being very nervous sitting out there wondering what was going to go wrong. Instant crowd? More sups? Get hit in the head with my board again? Southwind? Yep, fucking southwind! Seriously, I would have gladly taken another sup... It only lasted for about 40 minutes before the wind turned south but I stayed out another hour knowing that the southwind looks offshore from LC...

99 cents worth of xmas lights

Anyway... I made about  $100 in dog sitting money, so over-budget yes, but still not completely broke, though I had to turn down a chance to see "X" tonight. I guess that is the cost of freedom. Financial freedom. I did manage an excellent surf and birthday lunch with a couple friends (not my birthday, Kims) Saw a movie about the haole royalty of Hawaii, drank plenty of good beer and cheap red wine, food made slowly, saw both daughters, got a free student edition of Photoshop, a handmade coffee mug, and took a trip to the 99 cent store, where I made the mistake buying only 99 cents worth of xmas lights instead of the $1.98 I needed. Also if you live around here you might have noticed, it's been pretty dang cold prompting me to go out and by two pair of polar fleece sweats for a mere $4.31 for the Carpinteria Thrift Store, along with at least one bundle of wood from the bag-less Albertsons.  Only one pair of the sweats worked out so if anyone needs a sweet pair of medium Patagonia sweats hit me up. Two bucks.. Just kidding you can have them.

Blurry pelican sunset with dogs.. No Charge

LC on Ten Dollars a Day - Day Two

Almost stayed on budget for day two. The surf looked pretty small from here, but definitely worth a closer look. So with the dogs loaded in the van I headed out about 7:30. I wish I could trust those two to hang out on the beach and not cause any trouble, but I don't. I also feel pretty guilty if I just leave 'em in the van, and head straight into the water, so I don't. Not much seaglass lately, but there have been an unusually large number of dead loons on the beach, both here, and in La Conchita too.. I don't know what's up with that but I can assure you Riley is not responsible.

An hour later I'm paddling out in some fun waist to chest high waves with light offshores and another refreshingly light crowd. Conditions were near perfect even though the swell dropped. Combine it with yesterday and it could have been all-time especially with the light crowds. Went straight to town today(save gas) My mission.. Pick up two bars of wax from Rincon Designs, and a few groceries from Von's. I always try to get people to buy me wax for my birthday, but that was way back in May so it was time to break down, or continue to slip all over the place with summer wax. Wax is now outrageously priced at $1.75 a bar. Maybe I do need to make that trip down to John's...

Across the street Von's is still killing seals, and birds, and turtles, with their useless plastic bags, that hold only 1 item, so I normally don't shop there. But in an effort to save gas, I put my canvas bag over my head and walked in to pick up a few things. By the way the Carpinteria Albertson's 100% Bagless Program looks like a 100% success to me. One of only two stores to go completely bagless in California on April 27th, 2011. No paper, no plastic, and guess what, the place is as crowded as ever, and most importantly people are bringing their own bags. A lot of them who would have never ever brought their own bags, never ever ever, and now its second nature. The point is we don't need to wait for a law to pass to ban those plastic bags, because there no law stating you have to use them in the first place!!! Waiting for the government to tell you whether you should or shouldn't use plastic bags, seems like a waste of time to me. Those guys are just one disappointment after another ( the government) I'll let you in a little tip too Von's, and all you other seal killing, bird chocking, plastic polluting monsters. It's rumored that Albertson's is saving 60K to 100k a year by getting rid of bags, so take that to your 1% and do the right thing!

Pulled Pork sandwiches on a French Roll for lunch, and Spicy Seafood Pasta, for dinner with a bottle of Firefly Ridge Cab $5.99 at Von's (plastic bag monsters) The finals of the World Cup of Surfing from Sunset Beach were sick with John John Florence winning convincingly and prompting me to put him on my Fantasy Surfer Team for Pipe at the ridiculously low price of 3,000,000.

Day two spending.
Surf Wax - $3.77..Groceries - $10.81.. Total Day 2 - 14.58
Total to Date - $32.09 Yep.. $12.09  Over budget, no problem don't need much tomorrow.

Big Bad Bag Man